19lana69's Blog

No matter how long we live for on this planet, it never seems long enough. Recently I lost a good friend and a relative ( my grandfather's cousin), but he was more than that. To my people, the Indigenous people of Australia he was a leader, an activist and a gutsy person. He helped change the law in Australia when the Aboriginal Peoples weren't even citizens in theri own country ( the 1967 Referndum). He fought for human rights for our people. He was Uncle Chicka Dixon.

My good friend Phylis was an elderly lady from our church, and I will miss her dearly. I just take comfort in the fact that she is asleep in the Lord, waiting on His return to gather all his people.

No matter what age we pass away, it's still not long enough for the loved ones that are left behind. We may greive and reminiseand I think this is essential for us to move on.

You know life is fragile, life can be hard, not fair at times, even sad, hopeless. But it has the potential to be strong, easygoing, justified, happy, and hopeful. No matter what we've experienced in our lifetime, we can learn from it. I know these 2 people have learned a lot from their lives and ultimately experienced victory. 

May they rest now.

Earlier tonight I made a volcano with my son, it was one of those boxed ones that you make. He was so excited when he painted it. It  had worked but not too good. You should have seen the look on his face when the 'lava' came out. I think I was just as excited as he was. I had never made one at school. We moved around a lot so I guess I must of missed it. Anyway  I said to my son we will make our own one soon. We do a lot of things together as his father doesn't live with us, I suppose I try to make up for it. And I missed out on a lot of things when I was growing up. I love my son, he's the best thing that's ever happened in my life, besides being filled with the Holy Spirit. 

I know how fragile life can be. You know there's a song called 'Life is fragile', I don't know who sings it. I should ask my neighbour who gave me a recording of it. Anyway I recommend listening to it.

Life can be good one minute and the next it can be such a mess, but we have to pick ourselves up and move along. I know this cause I thought everything was pretty cool, mum's health wasn't too bad (could be worse), my son was happy at school, I was doing o.k at uni, happy with my friends, had good  neighbours, loved my church, yeah life was good. Then the bomb fell, well mum broke the news she wanted to move. That should be her business but you see I'm her carer, she has a few illnesses and among them is depression. She's not thinking straight at the moment and this affects my son and I. If she moves then we have to also ( we live in government housing) and they won't let us stay in our house. Anyway to cut it short we have to give up our life as we know it and move to where we can be housed. I like the idea of living alone with my son again ( we moved in with mum when she got sick). The thing is starting all over again, but at least we have our health. I can't do anything for mum, she's in denial and I can't even mention her illnesses anymore. But I let her know she will always have a room with us. It was hard enough to sit back and watch what she was doing to herself but now I need to deal with what she's doing to us. I don't blame her, how can I? I'm so glad I have Jesus with me and he will never let me go. I know the Lord will carry me through and maybe this is just a reminder of how fragile life is. We need to cherrish every moment we have with our loved ones and our life. This is just another  trial I need to get through. And praise the Lord I will.            

Life is so full on at the moment. I am carer for my mum, am raising a little boy, attending last year of uni, moving house soon, sometimes volunteer at Aboriginal organisation, member of women's group and in my spare time I sometimes pray (about having enough time and energy to do all these things, ha ha ). Life is good, full , but good. And when it gets too hard I just step out of the situation and think what else would I want to be doing? Answer= nothing. It's all good. Contented and happy.  

Life is good and sometimes not so good. As a child we moved around a lot, I never went to 1 school for more than a year in my whole education years. We've had some tough times  but also some good times. I remember the whole family getting together almost every holidays. Cause we lived with my grandparents a lot of the time, most of the family would come to our place, the good old days.I know the life I've had has shaped me to who I am today, but that does'nt mean I would ever be so unstable with my son. I left school when I was 14. With not much education I am now finishing my last year at uni ( a bachulor of community management). Overall life is good, I think it's your attitude towards it that gets you by. And when things are really tough and it looks like there's no way out, go somewhere where you're alone, look up to the sky and scream for help. There's someone up there just waiting for you to call out to Him. Or you can always tell me, I'm a good listener but I can't help you like he can.